Nobody ever said it was unmanly
Not a soul said it was unsightly
The things we trick ourselves into thinking
When will it stop, with our emotions its only monkeying
Some will say they never cry
But, that is whole heartily a lie
From the wimpiest to the most manly man
They all cry, but to the inside do they cram
It is perfect fine to admit that you are not fine
To show that you are slowly losing your mind
That the feelings you have caged are making you ill
Saying that you have lost every ounce of will
Someday's you just want to slink around on the floor
Being simply, but a human caterpillar
Eat, Slink, Sleep, Slink, Slink and Slink some more
Not wanting to go anywhere near or out your door
Other times you just feel disabled and can't move
No desire, no drive, to even turn on your favorite song and groove
Where laying in bed all day sounds like a fantastic plan
This happens even to the best of men
But we all throw on our happy face and clothes and face the world
Cause why would anybody except our emotions to be whirled
We are always the brave one who could with stand anything
A hurricane, the front lines, the apocalypse, just everything
While on the outside we may just seem a little off
Just appearing as thought we can shrug it off with a skoff
But if you would only glimpse to what is going on inside of us
A nightmare, the worst storm of the century , but that would even begin to address
Some nights we get no sleep, just staring at the ceiling
wondering where the hell we went wrong, was there any feeling
Those are nights are the worse of any, by far
Sometimes it is enough tears to fill a large jar
The shakes, the aches, and the headaches
Just a daily dose of what we all hide
From everybody else we all know, there is something we hold inside
Never to let it out, we'd rather let it eat us alive
So here I am making my stand against the norm
Don't get me wrong I'll still weather the storm
But I'm no longer afraid to let the tears roll down my face
Slowly sliding down, as we make our fall from grace
All I have left to do is spread my wings and try to fly
I know I won't succeed the first time, and maybe get a black-eye
But if I just keep trying enough, then maybe one day I'll be airborne
Where I can fly free, escape the norm, expectations, and scorn.
For I will now rise from the ashes
Don't you dare call me pretentious
For here I make my stand to be nothing short of who I am
And for those with me, they will love me for everything I can't and can
Friday, January 27, 2012
Saturday, January 21, 2012
A High School Crush
Walking in the halls of his educational establishment
Just to peek a glance at the girl that has caught his eye
To him, she is the most beautiful girl he has ever seen
A girl so pretty, that he convinces himself he stands no chance
Every day he walks right by her, seeing her face
But most days he can't even muster up the courage to say hi
Not even to speak a simple greeting
Maybe every one is right, she is out of his league
Every day in math they always sit next to each other
Day in and day out that math class is so boring
He's nice and makes sure to leave his paper visible enough
So that come test day, she will pass the test
Every day his friends at lunch tease him about his crush
Telling him there is no way in the world he'll land that catch
Always putting him down, and never telling him he can do it
So he believes that he can't do it, and he is "okay" with it now
So he just goes on with his day, repeating the same patterns
Wondering why he wasn't good enough for this girl
Just accepting that it must be because he is a nerd
Not realizing his friends planted that in his mind
Each and every day he says he will get more and more courage
So that one day soon he will be able to strike up a conversation
Then maybe he can express his feelings and throw his heart out
To hope that she catches it, and keeps it safe instead of throwing it to the ground
He will tell her how beautiful and lovely she is
And that he only wants to love and cherish her and treat her with respect
He just wants to be by her side when ever she needs it
But he never does, because his friends tell him he can't do it
Little does he know, that he isn't alone in this matter
But someone else is just as dumb founded and lost as he
All their friends telling them that the other isn't good enough
That it would be weird, they are from "two different parts of society"
Everyday since the 6th grade she has always found him cute
Not a day goes by where she doesn't want to just go up and say hi
Sneaking glances at him when she thinks he isn't looking
Just to see how cute he is everyday
No matter what she tells her friends, they never see past the outside
All they see is what appears on the surface, not who he really is
Falling to the stereotype and being disgusted that she would even think
To date a "guy like that" one that isn't as popular as they
Every day she tells her self just a little more courage
One day she will be able to just say hi
But that courage is hard to find, somewhere buried deep inside
The want and desire to break out of the stereotype that traps her
She sits next to him in math everyday, every single day
Not because she needs him to cheat off, because she secretly has a better grade
She just wants to be close to him, to feel like maybe there is something
To see his shining face every day, so she never forgets what it looks like
All she is hoping for is that maybe between the two of them there will be courage
Enough for one of them to start a conversation that leads to anywhere
Just a talk to get them lost in the moment and get them learning about each other
So that maybe, just maybe one day he will ask her out
Every year at the dances she either sees him with a girl that ditched him
Or notices that he never showed up, and there is only a simple thing she wants
To Dance that slow dance, and feel like the spotlight is on her
Not because she is popular, but because he is looking into her eyes
Should he offer up his feelings and heart to her
She'd take care of them with the greatest and most loving care
Never wanting to hurt or deny them leaving him hurt
For she loves and cherishes him every single day already
Days and weeks go by but nothing is happening between them
Just the same pattern that has been going on since 8th grade
Like this little dance they do, never to close, but never to far
A mutual friend has noticed these feelings as he saw them look at each other
This friend has no judgement, none at all, for he sees no reason for them not to try
So he begins to scheme, a schemish scheme, and idea so brilliant its simple
He sees that all he needs to do is get them to talk, to get the conversation flowing
So he invites both of them to lunch that Saturday, and of course they both agree
He really doesn't have to do much, he just says a few words to get them going
After awhile he notices things are going great, so he finishes up his lunch
Politely excusing himself from the table to a separate excuse
He goes up and pays the entire bill, and without a trace walks out
The following Monday when he gets to school he is in for a pleasant surprise
From the parking lot he seems them both walking, but this time its different
For they are hand in hand, and nothing is going to stop them
And from there the rest is history
They looked past what all their friends were saying, seeing what they saw
There couldn't be a tighter bond, or a stronger love in the world
They overcame everything in high school, the typical nerd and cheerleader
And that friend, he never expected anything in return, never brought it up as leverage
To this day, those two are still deeply and madly in love
nothing could tear them apart, not even a disaster
All grown up and married, and a set of kids. A boy and a girl
And guess who they made the godfather, the friend who just brought together true love
Just to peek a glance at the girl that has caught his eye
To him, she is the most beautiful girl he has ever seen
A girl so pretty, that he convinces himself he stands no chance
Every day he walks right by her, seeing her face
But most days he can't even muster up the courage to say hi
Not even to speak a simple greeting
Maybe every one is right, she is out of his league
Every day in math they always sit next to each other
Day in and day out that math class is so boring
He's nice and makes sure to leave his paper visible enough
So that come test day, she will pass the test
Every day his friends at lunch tease him about his crush
Telling him there is no way in the world he'll land that catch
Always putting him down, and never telling him he can do it
So he believes that he can't do it, and he is "okay" with it now
So he just goes on with his day, repeating the same patterns
Wondering why he wasn't good enough for this girl
Just accepting that it must be because he is a nerd
Not realizing his friends planted that in his mind
Each and every day he says he will get more and more courage
So that one day soon he will be able to strike up a conversation
Then maybe he can express his feelings and throw his heart out
To hope that she catches it, and keeps it safe instead of throwing it to the ground
He will tell her how beautiful and lovely she is
And that he only wants to love and cherish her and treat her with respect
He just wants to be by her side when ever she needs it
But he never does, because his friends tell him he can't do it
Little does he know, that he isn't alone in this matter
But someone else is just as dumb founded and lost as he
All their friends telling them that the other isn't good enough
That it would be weird, they are from "two different parts of society"
Everyday since the 6th grade she has always found him cute
Not a day goes by where she doesn't want to just go up and say hi
Sneaking glances at him when she thinks he isn't looking
Just to see how cute he is everyday
No matter what she tells her friends, they never see past the outside
All they see is what appears on the surface, not who he really is
Falling to the stereotype and being disgusted that she would even think
To date a "guy like that" one that isn't as popular as they
Every day she tells her self just a little more courage
One day she will be able to just say hi
But that courage is hard to find, somewhere buried deep inside
The want and desire to break out of the stereotype that traps her
She sits next to him in math everyday, every single day
Not because she needs him to cheat off, because she secretly has a better grade
She just wants to be close to him, to feel like maybe there is something
To see his shining face every day, so she never forgets what it looks like
All she is hoping for is that maybe between the two of them there will be courage
Enough for one of them to start a conversation that leads to anywhere
Just a talk to get them lost in the moment and get them learning about each other
So that maybe, just maybe one day he will ask her out
Every year at the dances she either sees him with a girl that ditched him
Or notices that he never showed up, and there is only a simple thing she wants
To Dance that slow dance, and feel like the spotlight is on her
Not because she is popular, but because he is looking into her eyes
Should he offer up his feelings and heart to her
She'd take care of them with the greatest and most loving care
Never wanting to hurt or deny them leaving him hurt
For she loves and cherishes him every single day already
Days and weeks go by but nothing is happening between them
Just the same pattern that has been going on since 8th grade
Like this little dance they do, never to close, but never to far
A mutual friend has noticed these feelings as he saw them look at each other
This friend has no judgement, none at all, for he sees no reason for them not to try
So he begins to scheme, a schemish scheme, and idea so brilliant its simple
He sees that all he needs to do is get them to talk, to get the conversation flowing
So he invites both of them to lunch that Saturday, and of course they both agree
He really doesn't have to do much, he just says a few words to get them going
After awhile he notices things are going great, so he finishes up his lunch
Politely excusing himself from the table to a separate excuse
He goes up and pays the entire bill, and without a trace walks out
The following Monday when he gets to school he is in for a pleasant surprise
From the parking lot he seems them both walking, but this time its different
For they are hand in hand, and nothing is going to stop them
And from there the rest is history
They looked past what all their friends were saying, seeing what they saw
There couldn't be a tighter bond, or a stronger love in the world
They overcame everything in high school, the typical nerd and cheerleader
And that friend, he never expected anything in return, never brought it up as leverage
To this day, those two are still deeply and madly in love
nothing could tear them apart, not even a disaster
All grown up and married, and a set of kids. A boy and a girl
And guess who they made the godfather, the friend who just brought together true love
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
In My Mind And My Bed There Is Now An Empty Space
I just can't seem to get you off my mind
Nothing I do, no matter how hard I grind
You're always there, with no where to go
The thought of your face dangling to and fro
Just rolling over in my mind I feel a blank space
A space that was occupied by your loving face
But now it is empty and vast
But still your face can't be surpassed
No matter what I do, I can't seem to fill the void
My brain sits back and with its' self is toyed
I need to find a way to clear my brain
Or it seems like my heart will be forever in pain
Every night I can't stop tossing and turning
The comfort of cuddling your body I'm yearning
But here I lay just look at the space you used to take
Now all that's left is an air pocket in your wake
This feeling, I don't know how much more I can stand
To endure this you must be more than a man
I know it may sound quite crazy
But my mind, it surely is a big bully
All I can do is sit on this front porch and swing
and try to tell my self, that you weren't the one for my ring
It is harder than it seems
To go on with out your face lit by sunbeams
I miss your ever so gentle kiss
The one that brought me great bliss
The presence of your body against mine
As we'd drift off to dream worlds of our own design
With each day I hope it gets a little easier
That my days won't just get bleaker and bleaker
But who ever gets to put their ring on you
Won't make me look like a fool
So here's a toast to a future filled with grace
One filled with no disgrace
Aw who am I kidding its hard to keep this face straight
When it is only you that I want to date
Nothing I do, no matter how hard I grind
You're always there, with no where to go
The thought of your face dangling to and fro
Just rolling over in my mind I feel a blank space
A space that was occupied by your loving face
But now it is empty and vast
But still your face can't be surpassed
No matter what I do, I can't seem to fill the void
My brain sits back and with its' self is toyed
I need to find a way to clear my brain
Or it seems like my heart will be forever in pain
Every night I can't stop tossing and turning
The comfort of cuddling your body I'm yearning
But here I lay just look at the space you used to take
Now all that's left is an air pocket in your wake
This feeling, I don't know how much more I can stand
To endure this you must be more than a man
I know it may sound quite crazy
But my mind, it surely is a big bully
All I can do is sit on this front porch and swing
and try to tell my self, that you weren't the one for my ring
It is harder than it seems
To go on with out your face lit by sunbeams
I miss your ever so gentle kiss
The one that brought me great bliss
The presence of your body against mine
As we'd drift off to dream worlds of our own design
With each day I hope it gets a little easier
That my days won't just get bleaker and bleaker
But who ever gets to put their ring on you
Won't make me look like a fool
So here's a toast to a future filled with grace
One filled with no disgrace
Aw who am I kidding its hard to keep this face straight
When it is only you that I want to date
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